Do not proceed if you are under 18...
Under 18 is not allowed....
Visit at your own risk.....
Read at your own risk.....
Blame no one after you read......
Keen in knowing what is down there?
Scrool down slowly......
Patience is virtue.....
Lets get started~!
JOk3 oN3
Ahbeng Looking for Wife
This is a story about Ahbeng in search of a wife with the help of his mother, Ahkew. One day Ahbeng's mother bring home 3 pretty girls and introduce to Ahbeng.The 3 pretty girls name and occupation :
1.) Ahuey - Telephonist
2.) Ahmoi - Primary Skool Teacher
3.) Ahlian - Bus Conductor
Ahbeng very sexcited lar of course then after a while of chatting with the girls his mother asked him.
Ahkew : Ahbeng, how ? Which one you like the most ?
Ahbeng : I like Ahlian the most
Ahkew : Aiyoh bus conductor only wor! where got future wan? Ahmoi not bad leh! gomen work you know? good benefit, next time your children wanna goto skool also easy
Ahbeng : Ahmah dunwan laaa!!
Ahkew : Why dunwan?
Ahbeng : bcoz skool teacher they love to say "PLEASE REPEAT!! DO AGAIN!!! I Want it done 10 times...SOME MORE, SOME MORE!" Like this very tiring everynite I can die one ahmah!
Ahkew : aiyoo!!! then Ahuey lar! at least she is better than Ahlian
Ahbeng : Dunwan also! ahmah, she is telephonist la! they love to say "WAIT A MINIT! PLEASE HOLD ON!" dem potong stim lidat ahmah where got mood to make baby la?
Ahkew : Aiyoyo!!! then what u like about Ahlian so much? bus conductor only wor!!! Where got future one ?
Ahbeng : Ahmah you dunno wan la ... I always take mini bus to KL, those women bus conductor always say "BANG! MASUK BELAKANG!!! MASUK DALAM SIKIT!!! DALAM ADA TEMPAT!!! MASUK MASUK!!!" (in yingrish it means "go in behind, go deep inside! go deeper some more! inside still got place! deeper! deeper!!!) everytime they say lidat i also very sexcited one !!!!
JOk3 T\/\/0
Ahbeng and Ahlian has been married for 20+ yrs ledi by now both of them also in their 50s ... so one day they sat down like usual to have their dinner ......
Ahbeng is at the dinner table with his wife Ahlian and their son (Lobert) and daughter (Lulu) whois in their teens, suddenly Lobert ask Ahbeng, “oi oldman! I curious hor …. How many kinda nenens are there in this world ar ?”
Ahbeng think think for a while then he give Lobert his wise answer
Ahbeng : there is 3 kinda nenens in this world, in the 20’s a girl nenens is like a melon ROUND and FIRM! In their 30s and 40s its like pears, still NICE and JUICY but SAGGING abit ledi la … then the last one is after 50s their nenens is like ONIONS.
Lobert : Onions ??? Why Onions ??
Ahbeng : Yes Onion, bcoz if look at them long enuff it will make u cry….
Lobert :
This conversation makes Ahlian and Lulu tulan ledi, so in retaliation Lulu asked her mum :
Lulu : Ahmah, how many types of jiao jiao is there in this world?
Ahlian : Well doter, lets see … a man in his 20s is like an oak tree STRONG, POWDERFOOL and HARD! Then there is man in theirs 30s and 40s which is like a birch FLEXIBLE but still RELIABLE
Lulu : then after that is what ?
Ahlian : After that would be like your dad whois in his 50s, he is like a Christmas tree!!!
Lulu : Ah ?? Christmas tree ???? why Christmas tree Ahmah?
Ahlian : Because they are dead from the root up and their balls are just for decoration purposes only!!!
J0K3 ThR33
I dunno whats wrong with me or that women just love telling me that they are having their period! So, now i m the period expert ledi izzit?
Just yesday, I got 3 of them telling me they got period and the way they described it was totally new to me!
The first one said :This month mine is kinda different than usual ... It looks like Hung Tao sar (red bean paste) just a little bit darker!
Then the second one told me this :
I think I m gonna die of excessive blood lost! I went to toilet just now to change my pad and after I m done with it ... it looks like the scene of a mass murder!
The third one is even better! She even told me a story! She said :
Last time when I kena dengue fever ... I was so sick that I need to do blood transfusion, so my bf gave me lotsa his blood to save me.
After I recovered, I found out that this bastard has been cheating behind my back, so i dumped that bastard and refused to meet him nor take his calls. Then one day he mailed me a note saying :
"Since you refused to forgive me and take me back, I demand that your returned my blood that i donated to you"
Then I send him back a package, in the package I include a bloody sanitary pad of mine and a note saying :
"Dont worry! I will pay you back in monthly installments!!!"
