If human can do it....Why cant they?

They can make xx***xx as well ^^

They too can be beggers

They can act like Tarzan too..


So If human can do it....Why cant they?

Men Are Hard To Please

Men Are Hard To Please
男人很难取悦!!

The problems with GUYS:
男人的问题是：

If u TREAT him nicely, he says u are IN LOVE with him;
如果妳对他好，他说妳爱上他了．
If u Don't, he says u are PROUD.
对他不好，他说妳骄傲．

If u DRESS Nicely, he says u are trying to LURE him;
如果妳穿得很漂亮，他说你企图诱惑他．
If u Don't, he says u are from KAMPUNG.
如果不，他说妳是乡下来的

If u ARGUE with him, he says u are STUBBORN;
如果妳跟他理论，他说妳固执
If u keep QUIET, he says u have no BRAINS.
如果妳沉默，他说妳没大脑！

If u are SMARTER than him, he'll lose FACE;
如果妳比他聪明，他说那是小聪明
If he's Smarter than u, he is GREAT.
如果他比你聪明，他就是有智慧！

If u don't Love him, he tries to POSSESS u;
如果妳不爱他，他想拥有妳
If u Love him, he will try to LEAVE u.(very true huh?)
如果妳爱他，他试着离开妳．

If u don't make love with him., he says u don't Love him;
如果妳不跟他做爱，他说妳不爱他
If u do!! he says u are CHEAP.
如果跟他做，他说你是贱货！

If u tell him your PROBLEM, he says u are TROUBLESOME;
如果妳告诉他妳的问题，他说妳麻烦
If u don't, he says that u don't TRUST him.
如果不，他说妳不信任他

If u SCOLD him, u are like a NANNY to him;
如果妳骂他，妳好象他奶妈
If he SCOLDS u, it is because he CARES for u.
如果他骂妳，是表示他“关心”妳

If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot be TRUSTED;
如果妳没有守承诺，妳就是不可信的人
If he BREAKS his, he is FORCED to do so.
如果他不守承诺，他是迫不得已的

If u SMOKE, u are BAD girl;
如果妳吸烟，妳是坏女孩
If he SMOKES, he is GENTLEMAN.
如果他吸烟，他是绅士

If u do WELL in your exams, he says it's LUCK;
如果妳考试成绩好，他说是运气
If he does WELL, it's BRAINS.
如果他考得好，他说是实力！

If u HURT him, u are CRUEL;
如果妳伤害了他，表示妳很残忍
If he HURTS u, u are too SENSITIVE!!
如果他伤害了妳，表示妳太敏感而且太难取悦！

SO HARD TO PLEASE!!!!!

If u share this to guys, they will swear that it's not true.......
如果你寄这封信给男生，他们会发誓以上是不正确的．．
but if u don't they say u are selfish.....
如果你不寄给他们，他们说妳自私．．

Ciplak and ciplak~!

So ,if all those i mentioned before still not enough to prove that Malaysia boleh,how about this?

Before proceeding to read,please click here



U faint, I faint!
Semua pengsan :P

Original Starbucks

Geez...What a crap~!

=_______________="

My Encounter :)

Just now, when I was still sleeping, my phone rang....

Incoming call from withheld
(It appeared as withheld when u register your phone number to be private)

A friend of mine is using this kind of service.
Without thinking much, I answered it with bo-song-people-kacau-me-sleeping tone.

Jason : Wtf? Apa lu mau? I'm sleeping leh...Go kacau ur dear la
(Wtf? What do u wan?I' m sleeping.Go disturb your dear.)

Withheld:先生﹐你會說華語嗎﹖
(Mr, can u speak Mandarin?)

Jason : Oi,NOT FUNNY OK?You want me whack you izit? LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!

Withheld:先生﹐你會說華語嗎﹖我是中國@*#*$集團的秘書。
(Mr,Can you speak Mandarin? I 'm a secretary China's @*#*^# Company.)

Jason : POLICE LAH!!!!WA AI KUN LA~~ MAI LAI LUAN WA LA!!!!
(Please la!! I WANT TO SLEEP LA! DONT DISTURV ME LA)

With that, I ended the call and continue my sleep :)
The next moment, my handphone rang again.
But, this time, it is different from the previous call.
The lady on the phone no longer gave me any chance to interrupt her and continued her cock and bull story.
Withheld:先生﹐你會說華語嗎﹖我是中國@*#*$集團的秘書。恭喜你﹗你贏得了400千美金﹗
(Mr,Can you speak Mandarin? I 'm a secretary China's @*#*^# Company.You just
won USD 400k)

Jason : 是是是....
(yes yes yes...)

Withheld:我說恭喜你﹗你贏得了400千美金﹗
(I said you just won yourself USD 400k)

WOW!!!400k..not RM is USD!... More than 1million Ringgit!!OMG

400k Usd~woooohooo

I started thinking about ways of spending those money :) $.$

A brand new PS3 for myself perhaps?
Or a mansion for my family?

Withheld:先生﹐你還在嗎﹖
(Are you there?)
Jason :是。怎﹖
(Yes.Anything?)
Withheld:恭喜你噢﹗
(Congrats)
Jason :噢﹐謝謝。真的有這樣大只
katak跳在路上meh?
(O?Thankyou.By the way, really got so lucky thing happen meh?)
Withheld:什麼﹖
(What?)
Jason :Err..我說我好幸運。。難怪有人說財神爺無所不在。
(I said I m damn lucky.God of wealth everywhere huh?)

And this time, you can even heard the song "財神到" in the phone...woo... Happy CNY :)
So, even though I fancy of having so much money, I still know that was a scam. I read KennySia.com ok?In case, you scammer out there don't know who is Kenny Sia... Here
And how kenny made fun of those idiots appeared in my sea of thought and i decided to have fun as well :)

Jason :那要怎樣拿錢﹖
(So,how can I take the money?)
Withheld﹕首先﹐告訴我你的名字
(Firstly, tell me your name)
Jason :噢﹖曹操。
(O? cao cao)
Withheld﹕什麼﹖
(What?)
Jason :曹操是我爺爺。
(I mean cao cao is my grandfather)
Withheld﹕真的嗎﹖
(Really?) <------ Still ask really... no doubt u really dumb! cao cao died so long dy..aiyoo Jason :是啊。我叫曹幾百
(Yea..My name is CaoCibai)

Withheld﹕那﹐曹幾百先生。麻煩你將你英文名字告訴我因為我們要轉帳到你戶口。
(Can you give us your name in english to make us easier to transfer money to your account)
Jason :你不是不會英語嗎﹖
(I thought you don't english?)
Withheld﹕你拼出來就好了。
(You spell it for me can already)
Jason :噢﹐C-a-o 空格C-i-b-a-i.
(O.C-a-o spacing C-i-b-a-i)
Withheld﹕是 C-a-o C-i-b-a-i 嗎﹖
(Izit C-a-o C-i-b-a-i?)
Jason :是是... 沒錯。你知道唱曹操 的林俊杰嗎﹖
(Yea..correct..Do you know the singer JJ who sing cao cao song?")
Withheld﹕知道。怎樣﹖
(Yea, why?)
Jason :沒有啦﹐其實他是我哥哥。
(nothing..he is my brother actually)
She also confused with what I said already. With cao cao as my grandfather and JJ as my bro, my background sure complicated :)
Withheld﹕林俊杰不是姓林嗎﹖
(I thought JJ's surname is lim)
Jason :沒有啦﹐ 他本來姓曹啊。
(Nola.. his actual surname is cao)
Withheld﹕是嗎﹖噢。對了﹐曹先生﹐你必需要付我們區區的RM5000因為這是手續的一部份。
(O.Really?Mr cao, you are required to pay us rm5k for the process of sending you the money)
Jason :我沒錢啊。怎麼付﹖
(I got no money.How to pay?)
Withheld﹕那我們只好把你的獎金送給別人了。
(Then we got no choice but to let other people to win your prize money)
Jason :我沒有。。我哥哥有啊。。你笨蛋啊你﹖
(I don't have.. but my bro got... you idiot izit?)
Withheld﹕那最好不過﹐400千美金是個大筆錢。。我也希望你得。
(It will be better in this case..I do hope you can get this sum of prize money)

She hope to get my rm5000 actually.. still keh si keh si... ~.~"
Jason :那好的。轉入你戶口嗎﹖
(Then ok...Transfer the money to your account?)
Withheld﹕是的。
(Yes.)
Jason :不好意思﹐我接個來電。。。你等等嘔。
(Sorry.Will you excuse me? I answer a call..Wait me k)
Withheld﹕好的。
(Ok..)

Leaving my phone on my desk with my pc speaker on with voices of drama, I went out to cinema and watch movie.
When I came back and saw my handphone call entry.. I was laughing like mad..
She waited me for almost 45 minutes...She must be thinking the voices in drama is me :P
SERVE YOU RIGHT!!!!
YOU call me YOU PAY IT!!!
Geez... instead of earning my rm5000.. you lost your money for calling me from china to malaysia...
Bravo... good job :)

Ways for men to answer Ladies' favourite questions

I believe most of the guys experience these!
You see, once you have a girlfriend, no matter how nice she is before you two started, eventually, she will be asking those questions that men feel annoying.

For example:
The most frequent question asked by ladies is
"If your mum and I dropped into the sea, who will you save 1st?"

Other questions that ladies might ask are:
2.Why do you love me?
3.Do I look beautiful today?
4.Do I look nicer than that girl?
(where the girl she refered to is actually look nicer or better than she is)

For the 1st question,
(a)If you answer her that you will save her 1st,

Ladies sure like us to cheat them huh?

(b)If you answer her that you will save your mum 1st,

(c) Or perhaps this is a better answer
and end up like this

For the 2nd question,
a bored question where men cant even find answer themselves.
(a)Just Feeling

(b)Just hug and kiss her and don't let her asking any further.
(c)Make her confused

(d)If answering like above still can make her satisfied, try this.
For the 3rd question,
You answer in either way also die... don't understand what I mean?
IF YES,
IF NO,
So a better way is,

JUST PRETEND to SLEEP LO :P

And girls, please give us a break cos we really love you :P